During pregnancy, it’s very common for soon to be mother & father to ask at some point: should we decide to find out our baby’s sex or wait until the baby is delivered (in order to be surprised)? In fact, it’s the second most common question asked in the pregnancy world. The first being, “when is your baby due?”
For one, it’s a very subjective question that both parties should sit down and discuss together what the pros and cons will be.
Some Advice for You on Waiting or Not
To help you decide on whether or not you should wait, let me offer you some advice on what to expect.
Most often, soon to be mothers will develop a bond with their child while the child is inside the womb and developing. Mothers generally form a bond that begins once the sex is determined. If you already have children, then knowing the sex gives you a topic of discussion to the siblings on how their new sister or brother will be welcomed into the family soon. Each small kick and movement becomes much more special when the sex is determined. Finding out that you’re having a boy or girl helps you begin forming a bond with your child before they are even born.
Mothers who choose not to know the sex often will not experience this bond. However, for first time pregnancies it may not make any difference.
Is It Worth the Wait?
Again, whether you decide to wait or not – the decision is entirely up to you. Most parents find the entire pregnancy 9-month process exciting whether they choose to wait or not. Once the baby is born, of course both parents will say it was “worth the wait”, however you may have slight regret by not finding out sooner, which tends to be the case in those who have had multiple pregnancies.
Those who decide to wait often find it very tough not giving in at any moment to determine the sex, however it makes it seem that much more special when the baby is finally delivered. Also, those who decide on waiting often have a lot of conversation with friends and family on the outcome of the sex. Some families will even place bets or have games as a result of waiting.
Whether you wait or not, pregnancy is exciting either way and your decision will not be something you go back in time and wish you had done otherwise. Either choice will result in a lot of happiness for both sides and well, if you decide to wait for your first pregnancy, then you could choose not to wait on your 2nd pregnancy (if you decide on having a sibling for your child) and get the best of both worlds. And by the 3rd child, you’ll know exactly what you’ll want to do.
Dr. Torbati is a obstetrician in Tarzana, serving nearby areas including Encino, Woodland Hills, Van Nuys, and more with pregnancy and obstetrics for women. For more information, please visit our website or call us @ (818) 344-0300.